I got my first anonymous post today. Highly entertaining as it was so specific that it couldn't possibly be left by anyone but BF's former sister-in-law, who goes by Caustic Cupcake online. So I figured that since she decided to make her communication to me public rather than just emailing me like an adult, I might as well make sure that everyone else gets to read it too.

If it's been three years and all of the resentment has been put behind you, why are you posting this entry?

I seem to recall the little boy's mom saying something similar about time having elapsed when you cried to her in a letter about how traumatic it was for you to have to see the Dreaded Aunt. Maybe you should give credit where credit is due.

Better yet, maybe you should drop all grudges and think of the boy first- and be grateful that you are so lucky to get to have him in you life and to love him, have him love you, and see him change and grow every day.

Now that is one caustic Cupcake.

So in exchange for her sweet comment and as a big thank you for being one of my most frequent readers, this one's just for her:

That was about as anonymous as the bright, shiny, new nails that you left under my tires. And it was just about as purpose driven.

#1. I never ever said I'd put that bullshit behind me. Why would I? You're still just as mean and nasty as you were then and last time I checked, if a dog bites you, the smart move is not turning your back and pretending it's no longer there. You drove an hour both ways to go to my house and put nails under my tires! And the last thing I heard from you on that subject was not let's see if we can put that behind us and be decent to each other because we both love the same little boy and we don't want to hurt him. No, you threatened me (2 years ago. There was still a little red Honda in that driveway until August '06 and you didn't pull that stunt until more than a month after I moved in) and then you gloated about it on your blog.

#2. I did not cry to anyone. I was pissed off and rightfully so. I had a major problem with your sister giving you my home address, email, and phone number without asking me if I was okay with it .

#3. I didn't have any problem with seeing you, I was perfectly willing to let the past stay there and to be just as cordial to you as I was to your boyfriend. You're the one who sent me a terse email, intentionally hiding your own personal email address, then showed up on my doorstep and refused to even say hello. That's not in that little boy's best interest. Your not interested in his best interest, you're interested in being a bitch. Every move you've made has made it perfectly obvious that you wanted to step on my toes as much as you could without being openly nasty. Passive aggression is still aggression.

#3.5 I don't even get this give credit where credit is due line. Who am I supposed to give credit to exactly? You haven't left anything in the past. Your sister was still wrong to give you my info without my say so. In fact, as far as I can tell I'm the only one who acted appropriately in this whole situation. (Besides being pissed about my personal information being handed over to someone who tried to flatten all of my tires, which I feel I was well within my rights to be, whether I went about it in the most tactful way or not.)

#5. Don't give me any of this bullshit about how I should just sit on my hands and be grateful that I get to spend time with him, as if that is some kind of right that you are conferring on me and have the ability to revoke. My seeing this child, loving him, watching and encouraging his growth, and being loved in return has absolutely nothing to do with you or with this situation. The only thing you're accomplishing with this immature crap is proving how bitter and vindictive you still are and showing how little interest you actually have in his best interest. I know, his mother knows, his father knows, everyone but you knows that this child is best served if the adults in his life can try their hardest to get along with one another. So he doesn't have to have two separate birthday parties every year. So he doesn't have to feel like a referee at his (insert sport of his choice) games. So he can have everyone he loves in one place without having any of them make him uncomfortable. The rest of us are doing that pretty damn well. We have all grown up and are living happier, more fulfilling lives than we were three years ago.

Why don't you join us?

I apologize for the sudden change in format here. I don't plan on making it a habit or letting this become that kind of blog. I certainly wish she'd just keep her mouth shut from here on out, which I doubt will happen, but I promise you won't have to read it if she doesn't. I'll get back to how insane things have been here and how great our new apartment is in short order.


  1. Believe it or not, I didn't leave the comment, and I don't know who did.

  2. People For the Ethical Treatment of A Little Boy Who Doesn't Deserve Your Emotional ProblemsFebruary 8, 2009 at 10:53 PM

    Who's still harping on three years ago now? You seem to have a novel full of harping pent up inside and yet you missed the whole point of Anon's comment: what is in the boy's best interest? Certainly not this.